THOUGH ENOUGH, STRONG ENOUGH, FEARLESS ENOUGH
by faith-in-Faith
Summary: When Sam doesn't know what to do with a girl, big brother comes to rescue.
1. Chapter 1

**THOUGH ENOUGH, STRONG ENOUGH, FEARLESS ENOUGH.**

Disclaimer: Don't own anything. Just borrow the characters to play with.

Rating: PG-13

Paring: Dean/Jess

Summary: When Sam doesn't know what to do with a girl, big brother comes to rescue.

Author's note. So this is a AU story about what would happen if Sam didn't want to hook up with Jessica, but Dean did. :) Sam is at Stanford and he and Dean are still close, but John and Sam are still not getting along at all... Please R&R :) Big thanks to Bee, for cheering on me and to Maya, my amazing beta! You guys rock!

Someone bumped into Sam, making him drop his books on the floor. Suppressing a curse, he got down on his knees and started to collect them.

"I'm so sorry," he heard a familiar voice say from above him.

"It's okay." He picked up the last book and stood up, sighing inwardly as he met the embarrassed gaze of Jessica Moore. Jessica was nice, but clumsy. It was the third time this week she had bumped into him, making him drop something, and to be honest, it started to get annoying. But he knew she couldn't help it. She probably had some kind of trouble with her eyesight or something.

He had shared that thought with Jake, but he had just laughed, telling Sam he was an idiot, claming that the reason Jessica kept bumping into Sam – and only Sam – was because she wanted Sam to notice her. Jake said Jessica had a crush on Sam, and the whole thing scared the shit out of him, because Sam simply didn't understand girls. Girls had always been Dean's thing – girls and hunting. Sam's thing was studying and research. Maybe he could call Dean and ask what to do. Dean would know, because what Dean didn't know about girls really wasn't worth knowing. Sam knew that for sure. Dean usually told him everything about his escapades with women and suddenly he wished he had listen closer, but the thought that he could call Dean soothed him, and he flashed Jessica a smile before walking away.

"Sam?" Sam stopped and turned around. "Yeah?"

Jessica blushed. "Um…I was thinking, maybe you could help me with the chemistry. I find it kind of difficult and I thought, since you had a full score on the last test, you could help me out a bit…"

Sam wondered how she knew his test scores, but he guessed she had asked someone. It wasn't like it was classified material or anything… But still the whole thing made him nervous, because he started to think Jake was right and, if he was, the last thing Sam should do was to encourage her, but, on the other hand – if she really needed help – it would be cruel of him to turn her down. God, he _really _needed to call Dean.

He swallowed hard. "Um… sure. Tomorrow? I'm kind of busy tonight." _Busy finding out how to deal with this._

Jessica nodded and flashed him a bright smile. "Sure. Thanks, Sam. You're the best."

SSSS

Sam lied down on his bed and closed his eyes, gently massaging his temples. The Jessica business has given him a headache and the tiredness he had felt all day threatened to overtake him, although it was only eight o'clock. But he couldn't go to sleep yet. He needed to call Dean first. He picked up his cell phone and dialled the number.

_"Dean."_

"Hi, Dean. It's me."

"_Hi, Sammy. What's up?"_

"I need your help," Sam said, trying not to sound like he was five.

"_Why? What's wrong?"_ Dean asked, worry evident in his voice. _"What kind of ghost is it?"_

Sam smiled. It was so Dean to assume it was a ghost problem. "It's nothing like that. I guess I need your advice more than your help."

Sam could almost hear Dean's eyebrow rise. _"My advice? On what kind of subject would a collage boy like you need my advice?"_

"It's about a girl," Sam answered quietly, suddenly feeling very stupid and he could hear the grin in Dean's voice when he replied.

"_Well, then you have come to the right pla__ce. I'm an expert on the subject and I'm glad you finally realized it."_

"Dean. Please," Sam begged. "This is serious."

Dean sobered up. _"__Okay__. Shoot."_

And Sam told him everything about Jessica and her clumsiness and, when he was done, Dean said; _"Your buddy is right, Sam. She has it bad for you."_

Sam moaned.

"_Why do you sound so tortured? This is great – unbelievable – but great!"_

"You don't understand," Sam said tiredly. "I don't like her – not that way."

"_Come on, Sam. Give her a chance. She sounds nice and she's hot, right?"_

Sam sighed. "I guess, but that's not the point. I don't want a relationship right now, and, besides, she's not my type."

Dean laughed. _"And how exactly would you know what's your type, Sam? You never had a girlfriend."_

"Doesn't mean I haven't looked," Sam replied in an offended voice.

"_That's my boy!" _Dean said with a laugh before turning serious. _"Look, Sam. If you really don't want to give it a try then you'll have to tell her you're not interested__. Anything __else would be cruel, because, as long as there's even the slightest bit of hope, she will keep trying. Chicks are funny that way. You need to play fair with them."_

"That sounds pretty pompous coming from the king of one night stands."

"_Hey! I never promise them anything. I always make my intentions clear fro__m the start!_" Dean sounded truly offended and Sam felt bad. "I know. I'm sorry. It's just..."

"_I know. But it will be __okay__, Sammy. I promise."_

Dean's voice was soft and reassuring. It was the 'don't-fear, big-brother-is-here' voice and Sam's eyes teared up. Suddenly he missed Dean so much it physically hurt. Stanford was great, but Dean had been close by his side his whole life, protecting him – fixing things – and sometimes Sam felt so lost. An almost overwhelming need to see Dean washed over him.

"Okay." A heartbeat of silence. "Dean?"

"_Yeah?" _

"Could you…um… Could you come here?" Sam asked, trying to keep the shakiness out of his voice, but he knew he had failed when he heard Dean's worried reply. Not that it really mattered. Sam knew the request itself was enough to give Dean a heart attack. You didn't ask for those kinds of things – not in their family.

"_What? Why? Is there something else going on?"_

Sam swallowed hard. "No. Everything is fine. I just… I just miss you."

Sam groaned inwardly. He couldn't believe he just said that. If Dean wasn't already convinced that Sam was possessed, insane or dying before, he definitely would be now.

"_Are you sure you__'re __okay__, Sammy? You don't sound so good,"_ Dean said, and then a faint _"Christo."_

Sam couldn't help but smile. Good old Dean. Always reliable and predictable – which was why Sam missed him so much.

He ran his hand over his face, quickly wiping away a couple of tears that had escaped as he tried to put himself together. This was ridicules. He was a grown man and here he sat crying like a baby because he missed his big brother.

"Yeah. I'm okay. Just tired, I guess."

"_Dude! You're not doing __that 'not-eating, not-sleeping, study-all-night' thing, are you?"_

"No. I promise. I just… I'm sorry. It's stupid. Just forget I said something."

Sam's voice cracked slightly and he cursed his inability to hold it together.

"_Look, Sammy. Don't sweat it, man. I'll be there. But it's gonna take a couple of days. I'm in the middle of a hunt I need to finish and I'm pretty far from you. Gonna take me a couple of days to get to you. But I'll be there in three, four days top__s, __okay_

"Okay"

There was a brief silence. _"And if you need your amazing big brother's help with something else – like tying your shoes – just call, __okay__?"_

Sam smiled despite himself. "Jerk."

"_Bye, bitch." _

_SSSS_

In the end, it took Dean five days to get to Stanford. The poltergeist had given him hell and he had to call Caleb for back up. The strange phone call from Sam didn't help at all. It had really made him worried and unfocused and, in the end, it almost cost him his life. He was just lucky Caleb got there in time. Dean made a face. Dad would kill him if he knew… But Dean couldn't help himself. Something was wrong with Sam. He knew it. It wasn't like Sam to be so clingy, so needy.

He knocked on the door and, just moments later, he was greeted by a smiling Sam. "Dean. Hi!"

"Hi, Sammy," Dean replied and stepped inside, closing the door behind him before giving Sam a good look over. The kid was pale as a ghost, dark circles under his eyes and he looked thinner than he had when Dean last saw him – six months ago.

"Dude, you look like crap! I _knew_ you were doing the 'not-eating, not-sleeping, just-studying' thing again!"

"It's not true! I am eating and sleeping."

Dean raised his eyebrows doubtfully. "Really?"

Sam blushed slightly. "Okay, so maybe not as much as I should, but I need to nail my tests or they're gonna kick me out. I'm here on a scholarship, remember? And…" He looked down and bit his lip. Dean frowned worriedly. "Money has been kind of tight lately."

"You're not eating because you don't have enough money?" Dean asked, his voice somewhere between anger and disbelief. "Why the hell didn't you call me?"

Sam shrugged. "Wanted to be independent, I guess and, besides, it's not like you have an ocean of money either."

Dean huffed angrily. "Independent, huh? Yeah, starving to death is a great way to prove your independency, and you know that, if I had known you needed money, I would have found a way to come up with it."

"I know. But…"

"No buts, Sammy. Next time you call me or I'm gonna kick your ass. Are we clear on that?"

"Yes, sir!" Sam replied mockingly, but there was a smile playing on his lips.

"Smartass." Dean whacked him over the head.

"OW!"

Dean grinned. "So what are you up to? Studying some geek stuff?"

"Yeah. I have a test in four days," Sam said with a sigh.

"Okay, why don't you get back to that? I'm gonna head out and get us some food and when I get back, we're gonna eat and then you're going to bed."

"Dean!" Sam protested indignantly. "It's only eight and I have tons of studying to do. You can't order me to bed like I'm four."

"Watch me!"

"Seriously, Dean. I can take care of myself!"

"Really? After what you just told me, I think the jury is still out on that one, little brother. Not to mention that you called me five days ago, pulling a major chick flick, making me think you were dying or something."

Sam blushed.

"Look, Sammy," Dean said, his voice a lot softer. "You're overworked and you need some food and rest. Listen to big brother, he always knows best."

Dean watched Sam's face crumble and the way he blinked his eyes and looked away told him his brother was close to tears and he felt his stomach tighten. What the hell was wrong with the kid?

"Sammy..." he started but was interrupted by a knock on the door.

Sam quickly went and opened it. Standing outside was a gregarious blond with an amazing body and Dean couldn't help but grin from ear to ear. This definitely was someone he would like to hook up with.

"Hi, Sam," the girl said shyly. "Feeling any better?"

"Yeah. I'm good now."

The girl smiled warmly. "Good. You had me worried."

Dean frowned. Was Sam sick? Was that why he looked like crap?

Sam blushed slightly. "No need to be. It was no big deal. I'm fine now."

"That's great, Sam. Look, since you're feeling better and everything, I was thinking. I'm gonna have a small party on Saturday. You think you'd like to come?"

"I don't know. My brother just came to visit and I don't want to leave him alone."  
Sam shifted uncomfortably and Dean suddenly realized this was the famous Jessica.

"Oh. Your brother is here? That's great, Sam. But he can come, too – it's not a problem."

"Jess… I don't know," Sam said hesitantly.

"You still feeling ill?" Jessica asked worriedly and Dean set his jaw. He was so going to kick Sam's ass for not telling him he'd been sick, but, at the same time, he was relieved. Sam's illness – whatever it was – explained his strange behaviour. As a kid, Sam had always been a clingy, overemotional wuss when he was sick and apparently that hadn't changed over the years.

Sam shot Dean a quick, guilt-filled look. "No, no. I'm fine. The antibiotic worked just fine. I'm still kind of tired, though, and I have this test on Monday and it's been awhile since I saw Dean…"

"Oh. Okay," Jessica looked slightly disappointed, but then an adorable smile lit up her pretty face. "Maybe some other time?"

Sam was about to answer, but Dean interrupted him, determined to put an end to this before it got really ugly. The girl was obviously totally wiped and, the longer Sam waited to tell her there was no chance, the longer it would take for her to get over it.

"No, it's fine. We'll be there. I'm looking forward to meeting some of Sam's friends."

"Dean!" Sam protested, glaring at Dean.

"Are you sure?" Jessica looked hesitantly between them.

Dean nodded. "We're sure. Sam spends way too much time in this room. He needs to get out more."

Jessica smiled warmly. "That's exactly what I've been telling him. See you Saturday then?

Dean flashed her his most charming smile. "Count on it."

Jessica smiled happily and said, "Bye, Sam."

"Bye," Sam murmured and closed the door. "Dean! How could you? You know I don't want to see her!"

"I know that, Sammy, but obviously you haven't told her the truth as we agreed you would and this is an excellent opportunity to do so."

"But…"

"No, buts, Sammy. I told you; chicks need the truth and, the longer you wait, the harder it's gonna get. And, speaking of the truth, Sam," Dean crossed his arms over his chest, "she obviously isn't the only one you've kept in the dark."

"Dean…"

"What's wrong with you?" he demanded. "How long have you been sick and what's the matter? And, most importantly, why the hell didn't you tell me?"

"Dean, look. I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but you never really gave me a chance and it's no big deal – just a simple strep throat. I went to see a doctor and he gave me some antibiotics for it. I'm fine now, Dean. I promise."

"Yeah, sure. Because you look really great."

"I'm okay – really. It's just some after effects. I have no fever and it barely hurts anymore. I'm fine now. I really am."

Dean wanted so badly to believe him, but Sam's pale face and haggard appearance told him otherwise. Then something dawned on him and he narrowed his eyes.

"Were you sick when you called me, too?"

Sam had the decency to look embarrassed. "Yeah, I was. But it had just started and I wasn't even aware of it. I swear!"

Dean rubbed his face in frustration. "God dammit, Sam! Do you have any idea how badly you scared me? I thought something was seriously wrong. Almost screwed up the hunt because of it! You can't call me and pull shit like that, Sam. It's not fair – not to mention dangerous!"

"I know and I'm really sorry," Sam whispered and Dean could see that – once again – it was tears in his eyes, which confirmed Dean's suspicion that Sam still wasn't entirely well. He sighed and ran his hand through his hair.

"It's okay, Sammy. I believe you and I forgive you, but, in return, you'll have to do as I say, okay?"

Sam nodded mutely.

"Good. Now you're gonna lie down and rest while I get the food and, as soon as you have eaten, you're off to bed."

Sam looked like he was about to object and Dean held up his hand. "No buts, Sam. You promised to do as you were told, remember? And, besides, you need to be well rested to nail that test, not to mention to be able to deal with that Jessica chick."

Sam sighed deeply and looked even more miserable than he had before.

Dean squeezed his shoulder. "Don't worry, Sammy. It will be okay. I'll be there, having your back – as always. Now get some rest."

"Okay," Sam said quietly and lay down on this bed.

Dean smiled a smile of victory and headed out through the door.

SSS

Saturday came way too fast for Sam's liking and soon he found himself standing in Jessica's small apartment, her arms around his neck in a hug. "Sam! It's so good to see you!" she squealed happily.

Sam patted her back awkwardly and decided that he might as well get it over with and then maybe he could go home. "It's nice to see you, too, Jessica. But I think we need to talk."

Jess looked worriedly at him. "About what? Is something wrong? Are you sick?"

Sam couldn't help but smile. She had the same one tracked mind when it came to him as Dean and Sam found it kind of ironic that she wanted him when she and Dean obviously were a match made in heaven.

"No, I'm fine. It's just that I…um… I think I'm picking up a vibe here." Sam closed his eyes. He really sucked at this. Taking a deep breath, he tried again. "What I'm trying to say is that it feels like you want us to be more than friends."

Jess smiled gently. "You're right. I do. You're a really sweet guy, Sam, and I would really like for us to be more than friends."

So this was it. This was where he broke Jessica's heart. Sam swallowed hard. He couldn't for the life of him understand how Dean did this all the time. "Well, the thing is… um… I don't feel the same and I don't think I ever will, so…" He looked at Jess, willing her to understand what he couldn't bring himself to say, and the way her face fell and kind of crumbled around the edges told him she did.

"Oh…Okay… I…" She swallowed hard. "I'm sorry. I never meant to make you feel uncomfortable. I'm just… God, Sam. I'm sorry. I never meant to…" Her eyes teared up and she quickly turned around and ran for the door.

"Jessica! Wait!" Sam called and went to go after her, but a firm hand on his shoulder stopped him.

He turned around and met Dean's serious eyes. "No, Sam. Let her go. Trust me; she doesn't want to talk to you right now."

"But she was upset! She cried, Dean!"

Dean gave a snort of laughter. "Well, what did you expect her to do? Thank you?"

"I don't know! I've never done this before, remember?" Sam replied angrily, and then, a lot softer, "I just don't want her to be alone when she's sad. She deserves better."

Dean sighed. "You look like crap again. Why don't you go home and get some rest?"

"But what about Jessica?"

Dean sighed again. "I'll go after her. Just go home and get some rest. I don't want you to end up sick again."

Sam hesitated. He did feel exhausted, but he had a feeling it had more to do with the tension of having to hurt a sweet person like Jessica than with getting sick again. "You're sure?"

Dean nodded. "I'm sure. Just get out of here. Big brother will fix this."

Sam gave him a grateful smile. "Thanks."

Dean waved him off. "Just go." And Sam disappeared through the door.

SSS

Dean made his way through the small crowd gathered in the apartment, trying to find Jessica, but she was no where in sight. Sighing, he ran his hand through his hair, trying to come up with an idea of where she might be. He really didn't want to do this. What he wanted was to go and check on Sam. The kid didn't seem to be able to quite bounce back from his illness. He was still pale and tired, despite Dean's efforts to nurse him back to health, and Dean started to fear it was something seriously wrong with him. But at the same time, he knew Sam and he knew how Sam used to totally ignore his own wellbeing when it came to studying. He simply seemed to forget to eat and sleep and Dean had had a hard time making him eat and sleep enough when he lived at home, and he could only imagine for how long Sam had been doing this now when no one was there to look out for the signs.

Dean sighed again and forced his mind back to the task at hand. He had promised Sam he would try to comfort Jessica and, the sooner he found her and got it over with, the sooner he could go back and take care of Sam. He decided to check outside. Maybe she had gone outside to get away from her friends, to be able to grieve in peace.

Dean spotted her as soon as he got out. She was sitting on a bench on the other side of the street staring at the ground. Dean crossed the street and sat down beside her on the bench.

"Hi, how are you doing?" he asked softly.

She looked up at him and the despair on her tear-swollen face stirred something inside of him that he usually only felt around Sam – an urge to protect and make things better.

"Your brother just told me he's not interested, how do you think I'm feeling?" she asked with a mix of anger and resignation in her voice.

"Pretty crappy?" Dean suggested carefully, making a face when he realized how stupid it sounded, but there was a reason he avoided chick flick moments like the plague, and a crying chick was even worse than a crying Sam.

But, to his surprise, the girl gave a snort of laughter. "Something like that, yeah."

Dean smiled. "You gotta forgive my brother. He's a dork."

Jessica looked down again and whispered. "No, he isn't. He's one of the nicest guys here."

Dean sighed. She was right. Sam was nice – too nice. Always had been. It was like his own personal curse and, as usual, it came back and kicked his ass. And this time, it managed to hurt someone else in the process. Life really sucked.

"Okay, maybe he is, but he's a dork when it comes to girls. You can't take it personal. It has nothing to do with you. Girls just aren't his thing."

"No?" Jessica looked up and dried at her tears. "You think he's gay?"

Dean laughed. "No, just a geek. All he can think of is books and studying and test results. He's always been that way. Even makes himself sick in the process."

"So I have noticed," Jess replied softly. "He's like a lost puppy or something, you know? You just can't help liking him and worry about him."

Dean rubbed this face tiredly. "Yeah, he's worry material, that's for sure."

Jess smiled. "That's cute you know?"

"What is?"

"The way you worry about him. Because you do that a lot, don't you?"

Dean shrugged. "I guess. It's kind of my job."

"To take care of him?"

"To take care of him, protect him, clean up his mess – whatever he needs." Dean replied uneasily, wondering why the hell he bared his soul to a total stranger.

"Was that why you came after me? To clean up his mess?"

"Yes and no. He wanted to go after you himself, didn't want you to be alone when you were upset, but I figured he was the last person you wanted to see, so I offered to go instead, to ease his mind."

Jessica's eyes filled with tears again. "I told you he's nice."

"Yeah, yeah, he is. But it's his loss, you know?"

"You really think so?"

"Yeah, I do. And don't worry. As nice and pretty as you are, you can have pretty much anyone you want."

"Really?"

Dean smiled again. "Really."

They sat in comfortable silence for a while and, when Dean was sure she had regained her composure, he said, "Well, I better be going. Good luck with everything."

Jessica smiled warmly at him. "Thank you. For coming after me. For comforting me."

Dean shrugged, trying to hide his discomfort. This girl made a lot of feelings well up inside him. Feelings he wasn't used to and it made him nervous. "You're welcome."

"Will I see you again?" she asked seriously.

"Probably. I'm planning on hanging around for awhile to make sure Sammy doesn't starve himself to death."

"Okay, see you around then, Dean Winchester," she said, giving him one of those pretty smiles of hers.

Dean smiled back. "Yeah, see you around."

Then he turned around and headed towards Sam's room, eager to check on his brother, but, at the same time, he already longed to see Jessica again.

TBC….


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's note.** So this is a AU story about what would happen if Sam didn't want to hook up with Jessica, but Dean did. :) Sam is at Stanford and he and Dean are still close, but John and Sam are still not getting along at all... So, chapter two is here. :) Chapter three is more than half way done, but considering school an stuff it still might take a while... But for now enjoy this and Please R&R :) Big thanks to Bee, for cheering on me and to Maya, my amazing beta! You guys rock!

**Disclaimer:** Don't own a thing

CHAPTER TWO

When Dean got home, he found Sam in bed, fast asleep, which both surprised and worried him. Because Sam had been very upset and worried about Jessica, and if he could fall asleep anyway, he really had to be exhausted – probably as exhausted as he looked – and that was definitely not a good thing.

Dean sighed and carefully, not wanting to wake his brother, put a hand on Sam's forehead to check for his worst enemy when it came to protecting Sam. A fever. Dean hated fevers and illnesses simply because he couldn't protect Sam from them. They always sneaked up on them when Dean least expected them to and – even worse – Dean had no weapon to kill them with. Sam's forehead wasn't hot, but not really cool either, and Dean frowned. Were they really going to go down this path again? Sam stirred under his touch and opened his eyes.

"Hi," Dean said softly.

Sam blinked sleepily at him before his eyes opened completely and he asked, "Jess?"

"She's okay, or at least will be. Don't worry about it. Just go back to sleep."

"Okay," Sam answered obediently and then a faint, "Thank you," before he closed his eyes.

Dean sighed again and gave Sam one more worried look before he got undressed and went to bed himself.

SSSS

Sunday went by without Sam looking any worse for wear than he had, and he was gone before Dean woke up on Monday morning. Dean spent the day looking for potential jobs, since he had a distinct feeling he would be staying for a while. Dad was going to kill him, but Dean couldn't really bring himself to care. Sammy first, that had been the standing order over the years, and if John suddenly didn't like it – too bad for him. Dean would never bail on his brother when he needed him.

Dean unlocked the door to Sam's dorm room later that afternoon and immediately spotted Sam sprawled out on his bed, asleep. There were red spots on his cheeks and the hair on his forehead looked damp. Dean made a face as he put the groceries down on the counter. He didn't need to feel Sam's forehead to know his worst enemy was back, but he did it anyway, feeling relieved when Sam's skin felt hot, but not dangerously hot. At least the kid wasn't burning up.

Sam jerked awake from Dean's touch and looked at him with glossy, frightened eyes.

"Shh, it's okay, Sammy. It's just me."

It took a couple of seconds for Sam to process the information, but just moments later, awareness was back in his eyes and he ran a hand over his face. "Hi."

Dean smiled. "Hi, sleeping beauty. How are you feeling?"

Sam sat up, groaning slightly as he did. "Got a killer headache."

"I bet. It's the fever."

"I'm running a fever?"

Dean's lips tightened. "Like you didn't know."

Sam rubbed his face. "I didn't. I swear. I thought it was the stress from the test."

"Stress from the test, huh?" Dean huffed angrily. "No wonder you're running on empty. You're no more capable to take care of yourself than a newborn kitten!"

"Dean!" Sam said angrily. But then a look of panic crossed his face. "But, I can't be sick again! I just can't! I'm gonna miss classes and I can't afford that. I've got more tests coming up that I need to nail! Please, Dean. I just can't."

"Well, it's not like you have a choice, so you better deal with it."

"No, Dean. You don't understand. I've missed a lot lately. I really can't afford not to go. I just can't."

Dean narrowed his eyes. "Dude, how many times have you been sick since I last saw you?"

Sam waved off his concern. "It doesn't matter. What matters is that I really need to go. Please, Dean."

Dean shook his head. "No, Sam. No fucking way! You're staying here, even if it means I'll have to tie you to the bed!"

"Come on, Dean. I'll take a couple of Advil, and then I'll be fine. I can both study and beat this. I know I can," Sam said in a small voice and looked pleadingly at Dean. With his eyes glossy and the cheeks red from the fever, he reminded Dean of a much younger Sam. Reminded him of the child Sam once was. The child Dean had spent his whole life to take care of and protect.

He sighed deeply and realized it was time to try a different approach. Ordering Sam around had never really worked. Not even for Dean.

"Sam, look at you. You're pale and tired all the time. You have lost weight, and you keep getting sick. You're running on empty, Sammy. Probably have for a long time, and you can't keep pushing yourself like this. Sooner or later it's gonna make you so sick you'll end up in the hospital, losing even more time away from school. You don't want that to happen, do you?"

"No. But I need to take these classes. I really do." The tears were back in Sam's eyes. "Please, Dean."

"No, Sammy," Dean replied gently. "You need to rest, but don't worry. I'll help you."

"How are you gonna help me? Are you planning on taking the classes for me?"

Dean snorted. "Hardly. But I'll figure something out, and I'm gonna stay here and take care of you until you're well again – well and well rested."

"Don't you need to hunt?"

"I'll take a break."

Sam eyed him wearily. "Dad's not gonna like it."

"I don't give a damn what Dad thinks. I'm staying with you for as long as I need to get you better – end of discussion."

Sam looked at him in wide-eyed disbelief. "You don't give a damn what Dad says?"

"Damn right I don't."

Sam continued to stare at him for a moment and then lowered his gaze to his hands. "Thanks."

"You're welcome," Dean replied with a half smile, pleased to see that Sam seemed relaxed, but just seconds later the worry was back on Sam's face.

"But how are we gonna afford it? I don't have any money. I had a job, but I got laid off because I got sick too much."

"Don't worry about it. I had a feeling you would end up sick again, so when you took that test of yours, I went looking for jobs and I've got two."

Sam's eyes widened again. "Two?"

Dean smiled proudly. "Yeah. One at a garage and one at the campus bar."

"But can you really work two jobs? What if you get sick, too?"

"Don't worry, little brother. I'm strong as an ox and – unlike yours – my immune system is in excellent shape. I'll live, and besides, the bar one is only every other weekend and when you geeks have a special occasion. So stop worrying. Money won't be an issue, and the rest we'll figure out together. I promise."

Sam looked at him for a long time. _Probably trying to figure out if I really will be able to fix this,_ Dean thought wearily and felt both relieved and grateful when Sam said, "Okay. But you really are a pain in the ass."

Dean grinned. "Yeah, and I'm planning on staying that way, so you better deal with it."

Sam sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "God, my head hurts."

Dean's mood quickly changed from victorious to worried. "I'll go and get you a couple of Advil. Why don't you lie back down?"

"Okay."

Dean returned with two Advil and a glass of water. "Here you go. Anything else hurts?"

"No, just my head," Sam answered tiredly.

Dean pattered Sam's chest lightly. "Okay, try to get some sleep. I'll wake you up for dinner."

"Not hungry," Sam murmured sleepily.

"Like I'd care. You're gonna eat, period," Dean huffed and put the blanket tighter around Sam's shoulders.

SSSS

Later that evening, Dean stood in front of the mirror, checking out his appearance, trying out a couple of smiles. He knew he had to be at his best to pull off his next mission. Finally, he decided it wouldn't get any better and went to check on Sam before he left.

Sam was fast asleep, resting peacefully. His fever was up to 101.9, and he hadn't eaten much for dinner, but Dean had managed to get him to drink both water and orange juice, and felt pretty pleased with himself. Especially since he was pretty sure he had found a solution to Sam's study problem. With a happy grin, he took his coat from the hook and headed out.

Dean quickly ran a hand over his hair, making sure nothing was sticking up funny before knocking on Jessica's door.

He had to knock twice, and was just about to leave when the door opened. "Dean! Hi! What brings you here?" she asked with a big smile.

Dean smiled back, surprised over how happy her smile made him feel. "I came to ask you a favor."

"A favor? What kind of favor?"

Dean shifted nervously, because they had reached the point where his plan – if he had read the signs wrong – could backfire. "Actually, it's more a favor for Sam."

"For Sam? I didn't think he wanted to have anything to do with me." Jessica sounded sad and heartbroken, and Dean felt his heart sink. Maybe this wouldn't work after all.

"He never said that. Just that he didn't want to be your boyfriend. And the thing is that he's in a kind of bad place right now. He's sick again and-"

"He's sick again?" Jessica interrupted worriedly. "It has to be like the forth time in two months or something."

"Really?"

She nodded gravely. "Yeah. He's not taking very good care of himself. It's like you said, studying and good grades are all he cares about. I think it's a very good think you came here. He needs someone to look after him."

Dean smiled warmly, partly because it was a part of his plan, and partly because her concern for Sam made her a good person in his eyes. "Yeah. Probably, but the thing is he's all worked up about all the classes he's gonna miss, and it's an almost impossible task to get him to rest. So… I was thinking since you take the same classes, that maybe you could copy your notes for him, maybe telling him the most important stuff...," he trailed off, not completely sure how this college stuff worked.

"Oh, sure! No problem. I'd be glad to. We're not taking the exact same classes, but I'll ask John and Jake to do the same."

"Thank you. It's very kind of you. I understand it has to feel a bit awkward, since he turned you down and everything."

"No. It's okay. I meant what I said the other day. He's one of the nicest guys here, and it's not his fault I was stupid enough to fall in love with him."

"It's okay. We all make mistakes."

Jessica laughed. "If you say so, but I have a feeling you know what you want, and how to get it."

Dean cocked an eyebrow. "You think so?"

Jessica blushed. "Sorry, that came out all wrong."

"Don't worry about it. Look I need to go back to Sam so..."

She ran her hand over her hair. "Yeah, of course. How is he anyway? It's nothing serious, right?"

"No, not yet, anyway. Just a fever and a headache."

"Okay. Tell him I said hi."

Dean nodded. "Sure."

"See you later, then. When I come by with Sam's notes."

"Yeah, sure. Take care, and thanks again."

She smiled. "Like I said, I'm happy to help. I want him to get better, too."

"Okay. Bye."

"Bye."

Dean turned and left with a content smile on his lips. It had all worked like a charm. Another victory for the Winchester charm.

SSSS

The knock on the door startled Dean a bit, and he quickly threw a glance over at the bed where Sam was fast asleep, like he had been since they got home from the doctor's. Luckily, he didn't seem to get disturbed by the knock, and Dean quickly hurried over to the door, before the person outside would get a chance to knock again.

When he opened the door, he was greeted by Jessica's smiling face. "Hi, I just wanted to bring over some notes for Sam," she said and held out a large stack of papers.

Dean quickly went out into the hallway and carefully closed the door behind him. Meeting Jessica's confused eyes he said, "Sam's asleep and he had a rough night so…"

Jess worried eyes met his. "He's worse?"

Dean sighed slightly and tiredly ran a hand over his hair. "Yeah, he woke up in the middle of the night saying his ear hurt, and his fever was up, so I took him to the doctors this morning. They said it was an ear infection. He's on antibiotics again."

"An ear infection?" Jess replied in surprise.

Dean grinned. "Yeah, I know. It's such childish disease."

He watched as Jessica tried to suppress a smile. "Don't be cruel. I'm sure he's miserable."

Dean turned serious again. "Yeah, he is. The doctor said he is completely run down and needs lots of rest."

"But he'll be okay, right?"

Dean set his jaw and nodded grimly. "Yeah, he is. The doctor said the antibiotics will cure the infection, and I'm planning on hanging around for awhile to make sure he rests."

"You're a really good brother," Jess said softly.

Dean shrugged and looked away, feeling embarrassed. "I try."

"Well," Jessica said and held out the stack of papers to him again, "I should be going. Tell Sam, I hope he'll feel better soon. I'll be back tomorrow with more."

Dean flashed her his best smile. "Yeah, thanks a lot. I know Sam will appreciate it."

Jessica smiled. "Okay, see you tomorrow, then."

"Yeah tomorrow," Dean answered before he went inside, quietly wondering why the thought seeing her again made him feel so happy.

The third time Jessica dropped by with notes, Sam was awake and well enough to talk to her, and they decided she would come back the next day and bring some of Sam's other buddies with her so they all could fill him in on what he'd missed.

The two guys seemed to like Sam a lot, and were a lot less annoying than the kids Dean had met when he worked at the bar, which could have something to do with the fact that they were sober, but still… They also made Sam laugh a lot, which was a good thing in Dean's book, because usually Sam was way too serious for his own good.

He tried to stay away as much as he could, and when they still hadn't left by dinner time, he made them spaghetti with sausage and was rewarded with one of Jessica's bright smiles.

"He can cook, too? How come he's still single?"

"Because he's a complete jerk and everybody who has spent more then five minutes with him knows that," Sam said teasingly, and quickly ducked to avoid Dean's hand when it shot out to whack him over the head.

Everybody laughed and Dean felt slightly pissed, but the warm smile Jessica gave him took the edge off, and he decided the little bastards could have this one.

An hour later, they still hadn't left and Sam started to look exhausted. Dean looked over at Jessica and managed to catch her gaze, silently begging her to make them leave. He knew it was a long shot, but to his surprise, she got the messages right away, and five minutes later, they had all left.

Dean looked over at Sam, who sat on his bed looking tired, cheeks slightly pink from fever or excitement. Dean hoped for the latter.

"You okay?"

Sam smiled. "Yeah, I'm fine."

"You sure?" Dean walked up to the bed and put a hand on Sam's forehead.

"Yes!" Sam rolled his eyes, but didn't try to move away.

Dean nodded, satisfied with then coolness of Sam's forehead. "Good. Why don't you go to bed?"

Sam obeyed, but the curses, and words like "jerk", "bossy" and "overprotective" that he murmured under his breath, told Dean that Sam definitely was on the road to recovery.

SSSS

Dean popped a beer open for another annoying college kid before taking the rag to sweep off the counter. This job really sucked. Collage kids were lousy tippers and annoying as hell, and he couldn't even hustle. He might not have much conscience left, but he drew the line with hustling from Sam's friends. So, yeah, this work really sucked, but money was money and he needed it.

"Hi." A vaguely familiar voice interrupted his thoughts. He looked up and was greeted by Jessica Moore's pretty smile.

"Hi, what can I get you?"

He flashed her one of his most charming smiles out of habit, but also because – for some reason – he was really happy to see her. He hadn't seen her much since Sam got well enough to go back to school, and he had really missed her.

"Just a beer, please."

Dean raised his eyebrows. "Beer, huh? I thought college girls preferred wine coolers and sissy stuff like that."

Jessica laughed. "I'm not like most girls."

Dean grinned. "So I've noticed."

She took a drink directly from the bottle, ignoring the glass he had put in front of her. She managed to do it without looking bold or vulgar – just tough as nails and gracious at the same time, and Dean felt a shiver run through his body. She really was something, and how Sam could not be interested was beyond him. But his brother was strange when it came to girls.

"I didn't know you worked here."

"Just every other weekend. Need the money since I can't do my ordinary gig when I'm staying with Sam."

"What exactly is your ordinary gig?"

Dean froze for second, wondering what to tell her, but quickly decided to go with the lie that was at least a bit closer to the truth than the ones he usually pulled, but still always impressed the chicks. "I'm a private investigator."

"Oh." She sounded both surprised and impressed, and Dean felt pleased with himself. Especially since this lie – for some reason – was the one that Sam found easiest to pull, which meant he could get back up if he needed. Not that he knew why he would need that since he usually didn't hang around long enough for anyone to get a chance to take a closer look, and Sam was definitely on his way to complete recovery, but still…

"So do you like it?"

"The P.I. job?"

"No, this one."

He shrugged. "Like my usual gig better, but it's not that bad, and like I said, I need the money."

She nodded knowingly and took another swig. "How's Sam?"

"Pretty good. He's still not eating much, but he's getting there."

"I don't think he has in a long time," Jessica said quietly.

Dean took a deep breath and let it out slow, trying to quell the anger. He wanted to kick Sam's ass so badly for not taking care of himself, but at the same time he felt guilty for not checking on him more often. Sam was his responsibility. It was his job to take care of him, and he had failed.

"Well, I'm changing that now."

Jessica nodded again. "That's good." She bit her bottom lip and hesitated before saying, "You know he's been out of money a lot lately, right?"

Dean's face hardened. "Yeah, I know. But I'm gonna make sure that doesn't happen again."

Jessica looked relieved. "Good. I know the guys have loaned him money, but none of us has that much to spare…"

Dean nodded, silently cursing on the inside. What had Sam been thinking? A Winchester did not owe people things. Dad would kill him if he knew. But then it hit him, Sam had only tried to do as he had been taught. Trying to survive no matter what. "I understand, but like I said, it won't happen again. Is there anyone I need to pay back?"

"Jake has lent him the most I think, but it's no rush. He doesn't care."

"I'll make sure he gets his money as soon as possible."

Jessica looked at him in awe. "You really are a good brother. Sam's lucky to have you."

Dean blushed. "Yeah, well, I try."

"Hey! Bartender! Can we get some attention over here?" A man shouted from the other end of the counter.

Dean sighed. "Sorry. I need to go"

Jess smiled softly. "It's okay. I should be going, too."

Dean caught her hand before she had a chance to turn around. "I was thinking, since you've been so great to Sam and all, maybe I could buy you lunch or something? You know – to thank you."

"You don't need to do that," she replied softly.

"I know. But I want to."

Jessica bit her lip nervously. "You don't think Sam will mind?"

"Why would he mind? And if he does – who cares? He had his chance and he blew it. And besides, it's not a date – just lunch."

"Okay."

"Bartender!"

"Just a sec! I'm coming! Tomorrow at twelve?"

Jessica smiled. "Tomorrow is fine."

SSSS

He squeezed her hand before letting go. "Good. See you then."

"You look awfully happy. What's up?" Sam asked, peering at Dean over the rim of his glass.

"Nothing. Just having a good day in generally," Dean answered calmly.

"Yeah, right," Sam replied sarcastically.

"What?"

"You having a good day usually means that you've killed something or got laid, and since you're not hunting for the moment, it's gotta be a girl. So, spill. Who is she?"

"I don't think that's any of your business."

Sam looked hurt. "Okay. Sorry I asked. Won't happen again."

"Come on Sam. Don't be like that. It's Jessica, okay?"

Sam started at him for a moment. "Jessica. Do you think that's so smart?"

"Why not? Are you jealous? Because, if that's the case, let me remind you about the fact that you had your chance and blew it," Dean said defensively.

Sam rubbed his face tiredly. "I know that, Dean. I'm not jealous. It's just that I don't think you dating Jessica right now is a good idea."

"Why not?"

"Because I just hurt her, which means she's fragile right now and, considering how your dates usually end, she's gonna end up hurt again and I'm afraid she can't take that right now."

"What's wrong with my dates?"

"They end with sex, and then it's over."

"It's good sex. Never had any complaints," Dean muttered.

Sam smirked. "I'm sure it is, but that's hardly the point."

"And besides, it's not a date – just lunch."

"And you gonna to stop there?"

Dean shrugged.

"Dean…"

"Just shut up, Sam! This is none of your business!"

"It is my business! She's my friend and I'm not gonna stand here and let her get hurt again!"

"Who says I'm gonna hurt her?"

"Because you always do, Dean! Because most women wants more than just one night of sex. No matter how good it is!"

Dean held up his hands in mock surrender. "Okay, okay! Chill man! I stop with lunch, okay? Gee, Sam, if I didn't know any better, I would think you're in love with her or something."

Sam blushed. "I'm not. Just don't want her to get hurt. She's nice."

Dean sighed. "Yeah, she is, and I promise not to hurt her. Scout's honor."

Sam just snorted, but was convinced enough to drop the subject.

SSSS

Of course Dean didn't stop with lunch. When did he ever? There was dinner and a movie, and more lunch dates, and it went on and on. Dean never said a word, but Sam knew anyway, because Jessica never stopped talking about it. It was Dean this and Dean that all hours of the day, and it was a good thing Sam loved them both, or he would have gone insane.

One thing bothered him, though – the ending. Because there was going to be an ending, and soon. By now, Sam was completely recovered, and he knew their Dad had called Dean at least twice, practically demanding he go back to work. But Dean had told him no, claiming Sam still wasn't well enough for him to leave, that he still was worried about his brother. Sam knew that part probably was true, because Sam had a feeling Dean would die before he stopped worrying about him, but that was so not the point. The point was that there was only as much stalling they could do. Sooner or later, John would call their bluff, probably by coming to check on Sam himself. Because, even though Sam knew his father most likely never would forgive him for leaving, he wasn't so dense he didn't care if his youngest son lived or died, and such a long period of sickness was sure to concern even John eventually – especially since it affected hunting. Sam had tried to come up with a solution, because both Jess and Dean would be heartbroken when Dean had to leave. But no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't find one. Well, there was one. He could get sick again. Then Dean would have to stay and Jess and he could fuss over him together, which seemed to be their favorite thing to do – next after sleeping together. Sam sighed. He had tried, he really had. He had tried to eat less, to not wear enough clothes – everything. But nothing worked. Dean had done a very good job of nursing him back to health, and Dean and Jess had teamed up on him, watching him like two hawks – or lovebirds with hawk eyes – making it impossible for him to get away with anything but healthy behavior. He sighed again before sticking the key in the lock to his dorm room. He had had a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach all day, and when he heard Dean's voice, respectful but with a touch of disappointment, repeating, "Yes, sir," several times in his phone, he knew the day he and Dean dreaded, and which Jess would have dreaded, too, if she had any clue what it meant, had come.

Dean snapped the phone shut with an angry and frustrated sigh and turned to look at Sam just as he closed the door behind him.

"Hey," Sam said quietly, "was that Dad?"

"Yeah."

"Let me guess, he ordered you to get your lazy ass back to hunting."

Dean ran his hand over his mouth and down his chin in that distressed way that was so _him._

"More like threaten to kill me if I didn't."

Sam gave a heavy sigh and sat down on the bed beside his brother. "Well, that sucks."

"Yeah," Dean agreed. "It does."

"So… I guess that means you and Jess is over."

Dean jerked up his head and stared worriedly at Sam. "What? Why? Did she say something to you? Did she tell you she wanted to break up?"

Sam frowned, because considering the conversation Dean just has had with their dad on the phone, it was a very strange thing to ask. "No, but you're leaving."

Dean looked challengingly at him. "Yeah. So?"

Sam stared at his brother in belief. "Are you telling me you're planning on having a relationship with her?"

Dean looked down at his hands. "Maybe."

Sam laughed.

Dean gave him an annoyed look. "What's so funny?"

"Dean, you don't _do_ relationship."

"Maybe I changed my mind."

"Changed your mind? Come on, Dean! You can't be serious. You're the one who always says relationships and hunting don't mix. And what happened to the guy who thought that women are best served in bed, without any strings attached?"

"Maybe it's different this time," Dean murmured quietly.

"What?"

"I said maybe it's different this time."

"What do you mean different?" Sam asked carefully, not used to Dean being this quiet.

Dean didn't answer.

Sam's eyes widened. "Oh my God, Dean! You're in love with her, aren't you?"

Again, Dean didn't answer – just buried his face in his hands.

Sam bit his bottom lip. This was even worse than he thought – a lot worse. Putting a comforting hand on his brother's shoulder, he asked, "So what are you gonna do?"

Dean looked up at him, the look on his face so heartbroken it almost took Sam's breath away. He wasn't used to his strong brother looking so lost and scared. "I can't let her go, Sam. I just can't."

Sam nodded. He knew Dean couldn't, because Dean was in love and he had never been that before. Plus Jess was happier than ever, and they were Sam's two favorite persons in the world, and therefore they deserved to be happy.

"So what are you gonna do?"

Dean sighed. "I don't know. It's not like I can disobey Dad and hang around."

Sam swallowed the – for him – obvious answer, because he knew all to well what it cost to disobey their father, and he was well aware that Dean was nowhere near ready to pay that price.

"You could come around every month or something," he offered quietly. "You can tell Dad you need to check on me. You would have no trouble making him believe that – after all, I am the black sheep of the family.

"Sammy…," Dean growled warningly.

"Sorry, Dean. I didn't mean to go there. What I'm trying to say is that, no matter what you decide to do, I'll have your back, okay?"

Dean blew out a breath. "I know. So you think that me coming around, like, once a month would be enough for her?"

Sam nodded. "Yeah, especially if you call her every day."

Dean looked up at him. "You think she'll go with that?"

Sam nodded again. "Yeah. I think she'll love that. She would think it is all romantic and stuff."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"How come you know so much about what women like all of a sudden? Wasn't it you who called me two months ago asking for advise?" Dean asked, eyeing him suspiciously.

Sam smiled. "I don't know what women like. I know what _Jessica_ likes_ you_ to do."

Dean looked surprised. "How?"

"Dude, you're all she talks about! It's Dean this and Dean that all day long. The only way for me not to know what she'd like you to do or not do is to be deaf, and unfortunately, that's not the case."

Dean grinned happily. "I told you I'm amazing with chicks."

Sam just rolled his eyes. "Whatever, Dean."

They sat in silence for awhile and then Sam asked, "So what's the story this time? What are you gonna tell her?"

Dean swallowed hard. "Well, I told her I was a P.I."

"I know. I've been backing that one up. Are you sticking with it?"

Dean shrugged. "I guess so. Have any better ideas?"

Sam chewed on his bottom lip for a few seconds. "You could always tell her the truth."

"The truth?" Dean laughed. "Come on, Sam. You can't be serious!"

Sam looked hurt. "I am! You're in love with her, and she's in love with you. You're planning on coming back to her and all. Are you really gonna live your whole life with someone who doesn't know who you really are?"

"She knows who I am, just not what I do. And it's not like you're any better, Sammy. How many people around here know who you really are?" Dean said defensively.

"No one. But that's not the point, Dean. And you know that. I'm not the one in love."

"And if you were the one in love, you'd tell her?"

Sam nodded gravely. "Yeah. I would."

"Well, in that case, let me give you an advice. Don't. Chicks can't handle the truth," Dean said bitterly.

Sam narrowed his eyes. "How can you be so sure?"

Dean held his eyes. "I just am, okay"

The raw look of hurt and betrayal in his brother's eyes told Sam Dean really _did_ know. The question was, how? And what had he missed? But no matter what it was, it had obviously been messy and Sam decided it was time to show some support. To prove that, even if he wasn't such a good brother as Dean, he was loyal and supportive when it counted. Especially since he knew all too well he owed Dean a lot more than just loyalty.

"So, P.I., then?"

Dean gave him a surprised but grateful smile. "Yeah."

"Okay."

There was a brief silence before Dean said, "Umm… you think you could keep an eye on her, check so the protecting charms and stuff is still there, stuff like that?"

"You put up protections in her apartment?"

Dean nodded.

"Sure. No problem."

"Good. Good. And you better stay out of trouble and call me if you're out of money, feeling sick, or if anything else is wrong, you hear?"

"I thought I wasn't allowed to call you when I was sick." Sam replied innocently.

"Sam, don't make me kick your ass the last thing I do before I leave."

Sam grinned. "Sorry, dude. I was just yanking you chain. I promise to behave. And take care of Jess," he added seriously.

"Thanks, man," Dean said and clamped his hand on Sam's shoulder. "I'll go and talk to Jess. I'll be back before I leave, okay?"

"Okay."

SSSS

Sam stood by the door, watching Dean, who stood by the Impala, talking to Jess, probably telling her the same thing he had told Sam, minus the "check the protecting stuff," and hopefully adding something along the lines of "I love you." It was hard to watch Dean leave again, made him feel all lonely, but it was a reassuring thought that he'd be back soon. Because he would. With the way he and Jess looked at each other right now, he doubted they would last a week apart.

They started kissing and Sam discretely turned away, not that Dean cared, but he knew Jess did, and he didn't want to embarrass her – or himself for that matter. It was just as much a little bother could take.

Dean and Jess broke apart and Dean waved to Sam to get over. Sam walked up to them and, once again, Dean clamped his hand down Sam's shoulder. "Stay safe, Sammy, and look out for Jessica for me, okay?"

Sam nodded gravely.

Dean turned to Jess and kissed her again. "Bye, Jessica. See you soon, and take care of that knuckleheaded brother of mine, okay?"

Jess laughed. "Okay. Be careful. I love you."

Dean blushed and blew her a kiss before he got into the car and drove away.

Sam and Jess stood together for the longest time, watching the car disappear, and then Jess looked up at him with pleading, fearful eyes. "He will be back, right?"

"He said he would, didn't he?"

Jess nodded.

"Then he will, Dean never breaks his promises."

TBC…..


End file.
